Quit Playing Games with my Heart Circa March 2008

I used to love that song, back in the day when they were cool. In fact I love that song even now and it feels pertinent to post it as the title to my blog.

that statement goes for everyone in my life, my family and my friends. I have slowly been learning that things aren’t always what they seem, people aren’t always who they are and trust may be given to the wrong people. My life is an open book, I don’t hide things from people because I don’t feel the need to, so when things I’ve said or done come back to bite me in the ass I should expect it…But I don’t, especially when I don’t do anything specific against or about anybody.

Everyhting i tell my friends and family I tell in cofidence and it seems that I have given my trust a little too easily to people I shouldn’t. I give my heart even easier then that. I believe honestly and truly that everyone has a good side, even if it needs to be brought out in time. I see the good in people, I see the good in life. i believe giving with your whole heart and loving with everything you have because thats’s what you were put on earth to do. Some people find that naive, but I find that it saves me. i would rather love, lose and learn then shut down and wonder for years later what-if. I try my hardest to make everyone happy, sometime’s even forgetting about myself in the process. Well i have come to the decision that I can’t do that anymore.

I can’t be a person to shut people out and just move on, I’m not the type to stop talking to you because I’m mad, and I’d rather hear the truth and work things out then just walk away. These things make me who i am, they are my greatest attribute and my greatest flaws.

I know these things as truth, i am a good mother and a good person, I am a nice person that will go out on a limb for all those I care about. And for all those I love I will stand by them until the day I die. With that said, this is the decision I have come down to:

My friends list is going to be pruned, my posts on here and elsewhere online are going to be few and until I can figure out who is really there I will not be as open with my life. Things are rapidly changing and as much as I want to love I am sick and tired of all the games played. I will keep in touch with those that want to keep in touch with me. As for everyone else, I hope that one day I can get to know you better again. I have enough love in my heart for all of you, if you just let me.

Take care of yourself, and those you care about…

I know I will

Much love and hope to everyone

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